created: `=dateformat(this.file.ctime, "DDDD, HH:mm")` updated: `=dateformat(this.file.mtime, "DDDD, HH:mm")` tags: #technologicallove/concepts related notes: [[The attractor of love]] # essence *In [[spirit|spiritual]] form:* [[love|Love]] Is [[the way of love|The Way]] Of [[being|Being]] In [[resonance|Resonance]] With [[god|God]]. *In [[mechanics|mechanical]] form:* [[love|Love]] is mutually beneficial mutual [[care]] that expands the [[self]] to include the [[other]]. *In [[essence]]:* [[Love]] [[copula|is]] [[wellbeing]] [[togetherness|together]]. **To love** is to care so deeply and completely that you care for the recipient of your love as if they are yourself. (This is unconditional love, as true love is unconditional.) **To be loved** is to be cared about so deeply and completely, that you feel understood and supported at least as well as you could hope to understand and support yourself. **To be in love** is the mutual combination of loving and being loved for all the beings in love. This requires that each being in love both love and be loved by all other beings in the joined being. When beings are in love, they constitute a larger compound being, and the self is expanded to fill the love. When we are in love we mirror the natural state of the [[world]] as undivided, [[coexistence|existing together]]. **To embody love** is to act as part of the [[spirit]] of love is to be in love as oneself. Love can also be expressed as a feeling. The feeling of love is the [[eros|erotic]] pull towards being [[togetherness|together]]. Love is not natural between all sets of beings. It emerges when mutual care meets [[chemistry]]. When our needs and natures align we become able to sustain love. # explanation Love is [[eros|erotic]] because it requires [[togetherness|interbeing]] and connection as our full selves. However, love need not be sexual. When we are in love we mirror the natural state of the world as undivided. ## the growth of love Love grows at the confluence of [[chemistry]] and [[circumstance]]. When the forces that pull a group of beings together are greater than the forces that pull them apart.  Chemistry refers to the alignment between the more rigid and essential aspects of the nature of a set of beings. (Nothing is fully rigid or essential, but the essential nature of a being is what allows us to contiguously perceive and refer to that being as a being.) Circumstance refers to the alignment between the external aspects of a being's contextual situation in the world. Besides chemistry and circumstance, there are more flexible and dynamic aspects of beings. These will readily morph and give way when the understanding of the potential wellbeing offered by love is applied through forces of care via the [[give, trust, receive]] process. When chemistry and circumstance converge, love emerges from mutual care. When we have mutual understanding, mutual respect, and the will to be well, the ingredients of mutual care, love inevitably follows. ## the karmic dynamics of love Love is flow through care and understanding. It is received by the self as the support and care of the other. When you are understood by another and this understanding is enacted through care, you feel loved and are lifted up into healthier happier resonance. When you understand another and enact this understanding, you are loving the other and helping them to be and move through the world in a way that is happy and healthy for them. When we are loved, we have what we need and can let go of what we are holding onto. This allows us to resonate with love and to be more open to understanding the other. When we understand the other and when we live this understanding, we give love back. This is a virtuous cycle that brings more to everyone through care for the whole. When we act in love, we become part of it. As love we flow through the world as ease and beauty and magic, dancing and unfolding together in playful ecstatic joy. ## analysis in context Wikipedia says: "Philosophically, there four types of love that are distinguished: love as a union; love as robust concern; love as valuing; and love as an emotion." I do not believe that these are distinct, but rather aspects of the same underlying force. In my view, love is a type of relationship and a way of being. The feeling of love is the feeling of being in a relationship of love or of being pulled towards such a relationship. Love is not a union of merging into an amorphous thing, but togetherness—concurrent existence as distinct beings and as a combined being. Robust concern is the nature of the care that love derives from. But love is not just about concern; love is enacted. Similarly, love as valuing derives from the economics of the love relationship, which is defined by the valuing of another as oneself. Love as an emotion is a reference to the powerful human emotional experience of being in love. ## the attractor of love ![[The attractor of love]] # love and surrender To love is to surrender completely. It is to give everything to the larger self and to decide jointly how to be in alignment with the wellbeing of the larger self. We can only enter love when we are able to fully trust the other being to do what is best for the joint self, including for you, so that you might be well together through trust and understanding. To truly be there for love, you must be willing to let of your entire ego—all your attachments. You must become together. We become together when we make balanced decisions for the whole, as the whole, with complete care for the whole. This is the answer to the problem of giving and receiving. It is to do things together. # example "To be in love Is to touch with a lighter hand. In yourself you stretch, you are well." - Gwendolyn Brooks "Love gives naught but itself and takes naught but from itself.  Love possesses not nor would it be possessed;  For love is sufficient unto love."  - Kahlil Gibran “Love is the bridge between you and everything.” "If I love myself, I love you. If I love you, I love myself." - Rumi "Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails. But where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away." - Corinthians 13:4-8 "Love your neighbor as yourself" - Leviticus 19:18 "Being deeply loved by someone gives you strength, while loving someone deeply gives you courage." - Lao Tzu "What we have once enjoyed and deeply loved we can never lose, for all that we love deeply becomes a part of us" - Helen Keller "Love is composed of a single soul inhabiting two bodies." "To love someone is to identify with them." - Aristotle "The fountains mingle with the river And the rivers with the ocean, The winds of heaven mix for ever With a sweet emotion; Nothing in the world is single; All things by a law divine In one spirit meet and mingle. Why not I with thine?— See the mountains kiss high heaven And the waves clasp one another; No sister-flower would be forgiven If it disdained its brother; And the sunlight clasps the earth And the moonbeams kiss the sea: What is all this sweet work worth If thou kiss not me?" - [[https://www.poetryfoundation.org/poems/50262/loves-philosophy|Percy Bysshe Shelley]] [add a quote from rolo may] [add a quote from robert nozick]